Where has Joy Surprised You?
by Laci Lee Adams, HUUC DLFD
The Popler-Adams family has recently added five new members (pictured above or left.) NO – they are not children, strictly speaking, but are aquatic inhabitants of our new fish tank.
Benny, my child – age five, has been requesting a fish for nearly a year. And Emily, my wife, has generally been inclined to grant this wish, largely because she had her own fish tank for many years during her childhood, adolescence, and young adulthood. I was seriously not enthused! I made the occasional attempt at raising sea monkeys growing up, but didn’t have fish for any extended period of my life. I was pretty sure that the work of caring for the fish tank and its inhabitants was going to fall to me. In my mind, the cost benefit analysis of a fish tank was pretty poor, i.e., lots of work (cost) for nothing in return (benefit.) Honestly, I thought, “What does anyone get from fish as pets?”
Wow – I was so wrong about this fish tank! The whole family is absolutely captivated by the fish tank and it inhabitants. The fish tank lives on a child-size table in our dining room, which puts it right at the kids’ eye level. Two mornings a week, one of Benny’s friends spends part of the morning with us before the kids walk to school together. And the fish table is their favorite place to share breakfast and yogurt “smoothies.” They talk to each other about the fish (offering interesting color commentary about the tank goings-on) and they talk to the fish. Molly, my child – 17 months, loves to independently make her way to the fish tank and chortles in delight by the color and the movement. Even Bagel, the dog, seems to enjoy stopping occasionally to watch the fish tank. Maybe the most surprising thing to me is the amount of joy that I have experienced by the addition of the fish tank to our lives.
The presence of the tank itself, and the constant sound of bubbling water, seems to add a peaceful element to our living space. I find myself gravitating to the fish tank when I feel overwhelmed, anxious, or uncertain. When I need to consider something, I often do that sitting next to the fish tank. I was entirely wrong about who shoulders the burden of caring for the tank, but I have found a ready helper. Benny has two jobs: feeding the fish and cleaning the tank walls. Benny takes seriously their job of feeding (but not overfeeding) the fish. If asked they can report the amount and last time they fed the fish. We also got a special magnetic wall cleaner, which Benny uses daily. Benny even helps (somewhat) with the weekly tasks of replacing tank water.
Joy can surprise us this way! It can find us unawares. Sometimes we experience joy in novel experiences or by finding help where we weren’t expecting it. Sometimes joy surprises us when we share in the joy of others (such as Molly’s full throttled enjoyment of a fish tank.) Sometimes joy surprises us when we find peace in an unlikely place. Sometimes joy finds us when something completely absurd but hoped for happens (like a snail on the back of a flamingo!)
I am profoundly grateful for this fish tank and its inhabitants, as it stands as a constant and sturdy reminder to me that joy can find me when I am least expecting it. There is much around me that does not make me feel joy today, but here’s the fish tank! Its bubbling still helps me breathe. I still gravitate to its presence. The snails still amaze me. The lives of the fish still delight me. The thrill of my children still makes me smile. They are tiny reminders that something else, something more (more love, more joy, more possibility) exists.
I hope you can find a bit of the same in these images.
If you are looking to have your own fish tank moment – consider the Popler-Adams fish tank. There are five inhabitants. The obvious front and center goldfish is Benny’s, named Kinns-dee. There is another less obvious goldfish here. If you need a hint, it’s a black goldfish. Benny has kindly given me rights to name this one, so I am open to suggestions.
There are also three snails. One of the snails you will not find in the picture, a small black and orange nerite snail. Its name is Houdini because I have honestly only seen that snail three or four times total and one sighting was on the dining room floor a week after I was convinced the snail had died or left! There are also two mystery snails (one gold and one black.) The gold mystery snail is named Camille, since she is better than her brother at camouflage. The black mystery snail also awaits a name, if inspiration strikes you!
Image source: photos by Laci Lee Adams